The looooong leap

I don't remember when exactly this happened but I guess I was 4-5 years old. It was our karayogam's Sports day and I had to participate for the frog jump competition. I knew that I am no good at this but I agreed to do it when my parents encouraged me. I was really tensed and when I reached the starting point I was feeling as if I would faint any moment. I looked all around for my mom and dad but couldn't locate them as I had lost all my senses and found every object or person before look all the same. A whistle blew and I felt it was blown inside my ears. The competition started. First I thought of getting up and running to somewhere else but then I changed my mind. After some time, I realized that I was at the first position...... but from the last. And moreover, every other participant was way ahead of me. I thought "I won't be the last one to reach the finishing point. I have to reach at least at the third position". I took a firm decision but I knew the task was very close to impossible. I thought about it and finally reached upon a solution. Without thinking much about the practicality of my "PLAN" I sprang into action, realizing I don't have much time to waste and what more.....??? I WON!!!

But I was surprised and actually shocked that instead of awarding the trophy to me, everyone were laughing as they saw me. Few of them even gave me a look as if they wanted to say "WHAT AN IDEA SIRJI" and my uncle, who was our karayogam President at that time, came to me and said "Oh you were wonderful. I never saw such a frog jump all my life". I didn't understand why were all these people teasing me? After all, I had reached the first position from the last.... So what if I had run all the to the finishing point and jumped the last few centimeters to the finishing line? The important part was that I reached and that too first, right?

Hasty tasting

As is the trend of the present, I too joined an entrance class in my 11th grade, TIME coaching center. The classes were during Saturday and Sunday every week, except second Saturday at Greets Academy, Matrubhumi. And as our usual classes, these too were boring and dry and the only freedom from this was the lunch break. I made a few friends right from my first day and we used to have our lunch in a hurry (not really) and go stand in a secluded area near the closed canteen of the school. One day, we noticed that our place was a bit crowded in the morning. Later we realized that the canteen was open and they had a delicious looking items on their menu. We decided to finish our lunch as soon as possible and attack the canteen with our orders. But to my amazement, or rather bewilderment I didn't know a single food name on the menu. One of my friend shared my situation. We both, the unknowns, stood there wondering for long and so the other three came to our rescue. They told us that among all the things on the menu the hot chocolate was the best. So we all decided to have it. We eagerly waited while the lady at the canteen prepared it and the moment we got it, we sipped on it as if we had remained hungry for over a decade. The next thing we knew was all of our eyes were changing into red and our tongues were burning. While we were figuring out what had happened, the bell rang announcing the end of our lunch break and we had more than half glass of the stuff remaining. We hadn't the wish to throw it off for its "monetary value" and neither could we gulp it down because of the "hot" part of it. It was then that one of my friend decided to neglect the temperature of the drink and have it in one sip and when she had completed this "dangerous" act we, the two unknowns, followed suit. The rest brainy people understood that this was not the right decision and threw their glasses into the bin. We all ran back to our class, which was about to begin and sat there fanning our poor tongue and watering it at times. To add to our misfortune, the temperature started going up and obviously now we were feeling hot inside and outside our body. Somehow, we controlled our emotions and waited for the class to get over and by the time it happened, everything was back to normal. The effect of the "hot" chocolate was lessening and we felt much relieved. From that day, we used to turn in the opposite direction if we saw somewhere a board saying "hot chocolate". The only positive result of consuming it was that none of the five of us slept in the afternoon class and were pretending to be attentive while others were lost in their dreams and afternoon naps......

Mistaken appreciation

Once, while I was in my 10th, I guess, I had to travel home alone by private bus. I was not used to travelling alone and that too in private buses as I had always traveled by our school bus. If ever I had to go by private bus, I always went with my family or friends. But this time I had to go alone. I had to take a bus from Tripunitra to Vytilla and another from Vytilla to my home. As I got into the bus from Tripunitra, I was a little scared to take an ST as I had heard how "nicely" the conductors treat students who take an ST. I didn't want to get that, at least not alone so I decided to pay the full charge. That was when a chechi, a college-goer, came and sat beside me. And the best part was that she took an ST. I didn't notice it first. But I noticed it when I heard the conductor praising me. He was telling the chechi "Are you not ashamed? Look at this girl. She is still in school and she pays full charge while you people who go to college take an ST. Hmmm...." That chechi listened with half ear and after he left, she eyed me in a way that I thought she would murder me at any moment. And for the conductor? He behaved as if I was some celebrity. Whenever he came near my seat, he would give me a broad smile as if I had given him a map to find a treasure. I myself felt that I had done something really great even though I had no intentions to do something like that. All along my way home I kept thinking of this incident.

A stupidity.....

I can't reason myself why i did certain things in my childhood days. I think i was just 4 or 5 yrs when i did this stupid act. It was the time when the mangoes in our courtyard ripened and as always i was eagerly waiting for my granny to pluck them down for me to slurp all time. I kept counting the ripe mangoes everyday and then i found that some mangoes started disappearing. I thought at first that it may have happened that they might have fallen down and as the tree was by the roadside, they might have been dead under some rude bike or harsh truck or some other vehicle. When i said so to my granny, she told me that it didn't fall but it was plucked down by someone at night when none of us were around. I got completely out of control when i imagined how somebody would be enjoying the juicy mangoes i was waiting to have. I decided not to give any more share of my mangoes to any vagabond :-/ and i found a way to stop them. The next day i was "all-ready" for my mango thieves. As it started getting dark, i kept waiting near the gate and when i saw a tall and stout guy trying to get his hands on one of my mangoes, i ran towards him with a "long" twig in my hands, hidden behind my back as i wanted to use it only if the "situation" got worse.

The first thing i did was to ask him why he was plucking down my mangoes. He smiled and replied that he was really hungry and wanted something to eat badly and as he don't have anything with him right now, he thought of having the mangoes. Then he added, "if only you allow". I was flattered. I put my "weapon" down and gave him an 'ok i permit' look. As i turned i saw my granny standing behind, her face all white as if she had just seen a ghost. As i went to her, she asked me what i was doing with those guys. I narrated the whole incident and she turned pale again. I asked her what happened and she replied that the guy with whom i just had a friendly chat was a rowdy or gangster of the area and not the poor "mango thieves" i was searching for. Now it was my turn to white. And the most dreadful thing was, whenever that guy saw me on the road after this, he always used to wave at me and i used to think "when on earth did i get that idea of talking with the mango thief?" 

a leg breaking trip.....

This happened when I went to fantasy park, malampuzha, with my family as part of our karayogam tour. My dad, sis n I got into a ride where 3 of us had to seat ourselves in a sheet n the sheet would slide through a slope. As I was the chota bacchu I had to squeeze myself between dad n sis. As soon as we started sliding, dad, who was at the front, bent backward and my sis bent forward. I got jammed in between and it was only when finally the ride was over and we got down that I realized my chappal had broken and I couldn't walk with it. So I removed them and gave it to my mom. To add to my discomfort of walking barefoot, a lady who was sweeping at the restaurant put my footwear in the waste bin while we left it at our table side for a few seconds to wash our hands. And the result..... I had to travel back home barefoot :-(

Am lost as always............

People say that experience is the best teacher. Once we learn a bitter lesson from experience, we become more cautious. But sometimes it so happen that we believe so much in some relations that even after being hurt umpteen times, we run after them. Even though we realize that they don't need us we keep thinking that we are an important part of their life. Its just that we fail to understand that some people find us as a time pass. They see us in the same way as a one year old sees a toy in front of him/her. But they never realize that unlike the toy, we have feelings and emotions. We laugh and cry with them, care and worry for them but they find our feelings as a joke. They laugh at our sincerity and love. And the funniest part is, when they laugh at us, we laugh with them because their happiness is always our first preference........

THE BEST PART.............

Why is it that some people matter a lot to us.....
When they are lost or upset, we go out of our limits to bring them back to normal and when they smile we feel as though we have conquered everything possible on Earth......
A short message or even a missed call from them brightens our face and makes our day while their absence even for a short while can take our life into complete darkness......
Why are they so important to us?
Why do we feel all alone when they are not around?
Why do we go behind them even though we realize they no longer wish our presence?
All these questions are always unanswered but the truth is that we cannot live without such people in our life.....
People for whom we care so much that we forget ourselves......
People who are more than our very own life to us......
People who can turn our life from heaven to hell and hell to heaven......
These people are a part of our life that cannot be missed......
We call them FRIENDS or FAMILY......
Whoever they are and however they are, they are the best part of our life......

A pappadam memory

It was the day of Thiruvonam. Everyone in my family was at the table, ready to have their sadya. I was the only one not interested in having my sadya. I was waiting for someone so eagerly and he was late unlike other onam days. Everyone asked me to start my lunch but I was adamant. I would only have my lunch when he comes and sits with me. Seeing my stubbornness, everyone else also waited. After some time he came. As soon as I saw him, my face brightened. He came and sat in the seat next to me and all of us started our Onasadya. As soon as I started having my lunch, i noticed that my pappadam were disappearing. Everytime I kept a new pappadam, it went missing. Then I caught the culprit red-handed. It was him. Sitting beside me, he could do it very easily. Then I fought with him as usual. Its been over 10 years since this day but it is still afresh in my mind. And one thing i realize is that it is not the sadya or anything else that I miss a lot but its him- his presence, his pranks, his love. And now whenever I eat a pappadam, its always him that I think of. I really miss you my dear uncle......

A week of enjoyment & fun...............

Our college tour was a memorable experience. In spite of the differences we were all together and enjoyed a lot teasing each other, playing pranks on each other and everyone else. Many places we visited has become a non-erasable memory in our hearts. While leaving Cochin, every one of us had just one thought- "Oh! how I am going to miss my family" but the moment our train started moving, we all were already into another world filled with fun and joy. One of the most memorable places which stays in my mind as if inscribed on a stone, is the Golconda Fort, which is a reflection on our culture and tradition and which is a perfect example of religious harmony. We also had a lot of fun at the NTR gardens. We also got a chance to visit the Film City in Hyderabad, the Birla Mandir, Char Minar etc. How we slept in the A/C coach, how we threatened the guy who kept following us in the NTR gardens, how we passed comments on the people in train, how we used to change our face at the sight of the "complimentary" breakfast and dinner, our aadha adhoora Hindi language, all this have become unforgettable and cherishing memories..........

a life changing experience

When i first stepped into St. Teresa's College to get an admission form, my words to my mom were "whatever happens, i will surely not study in this college". Maybe god didn't like my over confidence and he admitted me to the same college.... i was least interested in going there and by the time i joined, the classes had already started. I still remember the first day i entered my class. I saw many faces staring at me- some friendly faces and some faces with an attitude like "oh who is she?". I really wanted to turn back and run to my dad who was standing behind me, outside our class. But i couldn't do that. My first day was really bad. I felt as if i had come to an alien land. I kept waiting for 2:20 pm so that i can run back home. The next day was not different either. But slowly i got a few angels as my friends. Then they became my best friends, I started enjoying my college life and now when it is time to say goodbye to college life, I seriously don't want to leave this place where I spent the golden period of my life- bunking long programmes, going out for lunch with friends, birthday surprises and treats, passing comments on each and every soul coming in front of us and all those pranks we did together. All these are like strings which hold me back. Will miss you my dear STC.........

i have always felt being emotionally attached to people will always hurt at the end. It is not just a thought but i have felt so from my own experience. Even though i stay away from relations they don't stay away from me and when i move closer to them they give me pain but even the pain it gives is also sweet and enjoyable....... Even though i feel my closed ones mostly don't understand me, they always are there with me at all occassions

away away n away.......

sometimes i feel like running away from my routine life and going to a lonely place where there is a house with a balcony from where i can see and feel the rain outside and sit for hours without any problems bothering me, without anyone telling me what is right for me and what is not but when i think of the reality of my life, many faces come into my mind. the faces of some angels called family and friends who, despite their own problems and tensions, are always there with me at all times........... they give me a new reason to live, to face any difficult situation without fear and they make me realize that life is not running away from the storm but facing it with strength and confidence

trying to be calm.....

i don't know what is happening to me these days..... i keep losing my temper every now n then... last week i had a small fight with my sister for a silly matter n a few days before i shouted at my mom for no reason..... and after a few minutes i myself realize i was wrong n start weeping..... n then i feel why in the world did i do it? am i lost or am i going to a condition where in only a psychiatrist can deal with me? i have been thinking of all this for a long time but i never get any answer to it and finally i decided to stop........
...........
...........
..........
to stop thinking..........
to stop reacting.........
and the next time something happens............
i again behave in the same way........ don't know why........
GOD SAVE ME.............

Had 2 days experience in theatre training..... it was worth attending...... a lot of information about how the theatre plays are organized and how they plan he things out keeping in mind every single minute thing and how they bring it out so beautifully...... the two day session had a lot of activities which was fun in doing and easy in learning.... it was indeed "behavioural therapy through theatre"

while on the way to attend the session on the first day, all of had in our mind a picture of a long and boring session of lectures and speeches. The next thing that came into our mind was that they were going to make us jump and roll over the place, run around the campus or some sort like that..... but after the session started all present there were praying that the session never gets over.....